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ACTION
Things you can do...
The
following visualization meditation is from The Natural Death Handbook
- Chapter 4
Training for Dying
Many meditations on dying are to be found in
Tibetan traditions, some charming ones as in the first passage below by
Stephen Levine, inspired by 'The Tibetan Book of the Dead'
Shining true being
Imagine that your body no longer has the strength, the energy, to maintain
its connection with the life-force, with the body of awareness within. And
imagine now that you are beginning to experience the process of dissolving
out of that body. Sensations from the body no longer so distinct, melting
away, leaving just a spaciousness. Dissolving out of the body. Leaving that
heavier form behind. Dissolving into consciousness itself.
My friend, listen now, for that which is called death has arrived. So let go
gently, gently, of all that holds you back. Of all that pulls you away from
this most precious moment. Know that now you have arrived at the transition
called death. Open to it. Let go into it.
Recognise the changing experience of the mind as it separates from the body,
dissolving.
Dissolving now into the realms of pure light. Your true nature shining
everywhere before you.
My friend, maintain an open-heartedness, a spaciousness of being that does
not grasp. Let things be as they are without the least attempt to interfere.
Grasping at nothing.
Enter the essential nature of your own being shining there before you, a
great luminosity. Rest in being. Knowing it for what it is. This light
shining, luminous. Your true self.
Let go, gently, gently, without the least force. Before you shines your true
being. It is without birth, without death.
Let go of all which distracts or confuses the mind, all that created density
in life.
Go gently into it. Do not be frightened or bewildered. Do not pull back in
fear from the immensity of your true being. Now is a moment for liberation.
Know that you are well guided by your compassion and love. You are the
essence of all things. You are the light.
From 'Who Dies?' by Stephen Levine.
Courtesy of The Natural Death Handbook website at:
http://www.globalideasbank.org/natdeath/ndhbook.html
BOOKS TO
READ...
Here is a very incomplete list of books on
Death and Dying for you to explore...
Albery, Nicholas and Wienrich, Stephanie (eds),
The New
Natural Death Handbook, 3rd edition.
Centre by Rider, 2000, 384 pp,
ISBN 0 7126 0576
Arya, Pandit Usharbudh,
Meditation and the Art of
Dying,
Himalayan, 1985, 180 pp,
ISBN 0 89389 056 1.
Bailey, Alice,
Death—The Great Adventure,
Lucis Press, 1985, 144 pp,
ISBN 085330 138 7
Boerstler, Richard,
Letting Go—A holistic and
meditative approach to living and dying,
Associates in Thanatology, 1985, 60
pp,
ISBN 0 9607928 0 5 T
Duda, Deborah,
Coming Home—A guide to dying at home
with dignity,
Aurora Press
PO Box 573, Santa Fe, New Mexico 87504, USA,
ISBN 0 943358 31 0.
Gold, E. J.,
The New
American Book of the Dead,
IDHHB Publishing
PO Box 370, Nevada City, CA
95959, USA,
ISBN 0 89556 051 8.
Rinpoche, Sogyal,
The Tibetan Book of Living
and Dying,
Rider/Random House, 1992, 427 pp, hardback,
ISBN 0 7126
5437 2.
Reyes, Benito
F.,
Conscious
Dying, Psychology Of
Death And Guide To Liberation
Published by World University Of America
Publication date: January, 1986
212 pp.
ISBN: 093937515X (paperback).
Storch, RN, MA, Susan C.,
Dying into Freedom—A
Nurse's Handbook to Conscious Dying.
Sachs, Robert/Foreword by Martin, Judy
Perfect Endings: A Conscious Approach To Dying And Death,
Paperback,
176 pages,
Publication Date: April 1998,
Publisher: Healing Art Press
ISBN:
0892817798
Click
here for a long list of books on death and dying on the Natural Death
website.
Being with Dying
Contemplative Approaches to Working with
Dying People for the Death in America Project,
January, 1995
Joan Halifax
...We need to
explore ways of being with dying that can serve both the caregiver and the dying
person practically and spiritually. We need ways to work with ourselves and with
the dying person that are basically helpful and pragmatic, often very ordinary
and essentially practical. Dying is a completely natural event. But there are
things that we can do, ways we can be that help the true nature of dying come
forth. These "ways of being" are expressed in terms such as
compassion, tolerance, ease, kindness, humor, warmth, wisdom, authenticity,
mindfulness, stability, openness, concentration, and so on. These are some of
the qualities of a psychologically and spiritually mature person. How are these
qualities fostered in our culture? What can we do to open these sensibilities
within professional and volunteer care givers (who generally enter their
professions with the highest intentions), as well as in our communities in
general, so family members and friends can have the internal means to work with
suffering and dying in a compassionate and skillful manner? These are
fundamental and important questions that direct us toward a thorough examination
of our world view, attitudes toward death, and the spiritual value of a
contemplative approach to living and dying. Today, some people realize that in a
very fundamental way, they may have a choice in how they die. A dying person can
dwell in justifiable suffering or use death to move him or her to a new level of
psychological and spiritual realization. We need to explore the elements of this
process of conscious dying, including the actual difficulties of making this
possibility a reality for a person who is suffering from depression, anxiety,
fear, or anger.
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Death is as sure for that which is born, as
birth is for that which is dead. Therefore grieve not for what is inevitable.
~ ~ Bhagavad Gita
More things to do...
What are some other
ways that we can improve the situation in America (and elsewhere) around the experience of
dying?
- Help develop and support
programs for care givers, dying people and professionals that are based in a
contemplative perspective and offer spiritual care. Training in
contemplative approaches and practices is important at the professional
level, where dying and death are encountered on a daily basis, and the
pressure of work and "patient load" is great. This should be
introduced into medical curriculum as a core element.
- It is important to
identify already existing groups and institutions who are doing, have done
or can do this type of contemplative work and infuse them with support to
deepen and expand their efforts. This would include Christian and Jewish
groups and congregations, elder community volunteers, hospice groups, and so
on. Grassroots work can be very effective because this is not only where
dying is happening, this is where low cost, effective support can be given.
- Training in contemplative
work with the dying needs to be developed that is culturally and spiritually
flexible. An inter-cultural and inter-religious group should be formed that
approaches the challenge of creating culturally relevant, flexible, and
effective training programs and care giving programs in spiritual care for
the dying that are appropriate for different cultural contexts.
- Just as there is sex
education in the school system, there should be education in the awareness
of death and dying and how to work with it. I feel that this educational
process should cover not only the physiology of dying but also the cultural,
spiritual and psychological dimensions of dying. There should be a
curriculum developed for young people and adults on training in the
awareness of death.
- Programs in community
building around the issue of death and dying should be created. Such
programs can deepen relationships in the community. It can deepen inquiry,
make genuine and effective support more available. It can help alleviate
care giving families who are under stress and pressure around the situation
of dying, take some of the work load off of the professional community, and
put dying where it most often should be, i.e., in the home and community
with loved ones.
- Model projects using a
contemplative and spiritual basis should be supported, created and evaluated
as to their effectiveness for: the dying person, the family, the care givers
and physicians.
- There should be a computer
network for dying people and caregivers where information and support can be
given.
- Small group meetings
should be supported for the exchange of ideas among care giving and
physician groups. Dying people should be included in such meetings.
- It is important to support
the development of pharmaceuticals to manage pain that do not diminish
mental acuity. It is also important to explore contemplative techniques for
dealing with severe pain.
- There should be a wide
range of audio, video and CD programs for care givers and dying people on
the many aspects of the dying process, including contemplative work with
dying people.
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A few websites
to explore:
http://rivendell.org/
GriefNet is
an Internet community of persons dealing with grief, death, and major loss. They
have 37 email
support groups and two web sites. The integrated approach to on line grief
support provides help to people working through loss and grief issues of all
kinds. Our companion site, KIDSAID,
provides a safe environment for kids and their parents to find information and
ask questions.
http://users.imag.net/~lon.death/iwg/iwg.html
The International Work Group on Death,
Dying, and Bereavement
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The International Work Group on Death,
Dying, and Bereavement is composed of clinicians, researchers and educators
dedicated to the development of knowledge, research and practice dealing
with death, dying, and bereavement, and with education about death, dying,
and bereavement. The organization sees itself as a catalyst and seeks to
promulgate its own work as well as the work of others.
| http://socialwork.about.com/careers/socialwork/cs/deathanddying/index_2.htm
From the About.com website
Death
and Dying
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End-of-life care, death,
dying and grief affect everyone. Social workers and those dealing with
end-of-life issues will find these resources helpful.
Association
for Death Education and Counseling
A multi-disciplinary professional organization.
Brown
Atlas Site of Death Statistics
Statistics examining where Americans with chronic illness died in 1989 and
1997. Where do Americans die? At home, in nursing homes or in the hospital?
It may depend on where you live.
Center
to Improve Care of the Dying
An interdisciplinary team of individuals engaged in research, public
advocacy, and education activities.
Choice
in Dying
A national not-for-profit organization dedicated to helping people
participate in decisions about end-of-life care.
DeathNET
An international archive specializing in all aspects of death and dying.
Some of the material is "on the fringes," but social workers and
those working with terminally ill should know about the site.
Funeral
Consumers Alliance
Site offers a variety of information regarding affordable funerals and what
people can do to plan. Also, available is an end-of-life planning kit.
Grief
Resources
Resources for those who have experienced a loss.
Growth
House
Provides end of life information and referral, public education, and
professional networking.
Growth
House
Provides end of life information and referral, public education, and
professional networking.
Let
the Choice be Mine
A personal guide to planning your own funeral.
Organizations
Information, resources and on-line support for the dying, the bereaved and
the professionals who provide grief counseling and services.
Partnership
for Caring
Partnership for Caring: American's Voices for the Dying is a coalition
advocating for needed changes.
Project
on Death in America
Supports research and program efforts to improve end-of-life care and
transform the culture of dying.
Self
Assessment of Your Beliefs
A self-assessment from About.com's Death and Dying Guide that gives you
insight into your attitude about death.
Suicide
Crisis Site
From About.com's Depression Guide, links to hot lines and information to
help someone with suicidal ideation.
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